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Are you abdicating responsibility for your own life?

A while ago I was chatting with a friend. She’s a lady I’ve known for years, but not in my immediate circle. I like her a lot and she’s great fun. Actually, she was a legal client of mine in my previous life.

I should have seen the signs then as she used to say to me “Well, you’re my solicitor, you tell me what to do”.

This was all fine and dandy in my previous incarnation – I was after all working in an advisory capacity. Or as a barrister friend of mine used to say, “We only give the advice – they don’t have to take it.” And that is what we were being paid for.

So, when I met this lady again and we got chatting about life coaching, she said, with a glint in her eye, almost rubbing her hands together:

“Oh, so I come to you with my problems

and you tell me what to do”.

I was at pains to explain to her that that’s exactly what a life coach does not do. I am not the expert in your life – you are. You have the answers within you, the life coach just helps you to find them (among other things).

But this wasn’t what she wanted to hear. “Sure, that’s no use to anyone!” she exclaimed and for a split second I considered if she might be right.

But then I thought, hang on a minute – that is a complete cop-out!

You are abdicating responsibility for your own life.

Why, oh why would you hand over control of important life decisions to someone else and then go along blindly with what they suggest??

That might be what they’d do in your situation, but that doesn’t mean it’s right for you.

If it all goes pear-shaped then of course, it wasn’t your fault. You have someone to blame. My life coach told me to do it! I didn’t have a say in my own life, I just went along with what I was told.

Like I say – COP OUT!

If that’s what you think life coaching is, then I’m afraid you and I aren’t going to get along!

I’m sorry to tell you but in life coaching you do the hard work, the thinking, the deciding, the doing and the answering if you don’t do it.

If you do that, or commit to doing it, then I am also your new best friend (you know the one who has your back, but who is also brutally honest?) your cheerleader and your biggest fan.

I believe in you.

I KNOW that you don’t need telling what to do.

I KNOW that you have the answers somewhere deep inside of you. It’s my job to find them, test them and help you take the steps and the actions to get there.

I KNOW that I can offer you a safe, supportive, non-judgmental and accountable space for you to explore what you need.

I know all of this for certain, but what I don’t know is whether you should leave your job, reduce your hours, get married, get divorced, have a child, start a business, ask for a rise, go for a promotion, change career, speak up at work, go on-line dating, travel the world, ditch a friend, write a book, become an actor etc, etc.

Only you know that.

And I can help you. That I know.

Book a free 15-minute call here.

Or if you are thinking of leaving you job, try my “Help you decide guide”.

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